Today’s entry is late, which is appropriate, because it has to do with waiting to make decisions.
There’s a school of thought that says to commit to a course of action as early as possible; this goes hand-in-hand with the Well-Planned Life philosophy. It’s not a bad thing to decide what you want to do and then take steps to make it happen, especially since some courses in the Well-Planned Life–becoming a doctor, or a lawyer, or a politician–take a lot of time and “runway” to achieve.
But I was discussing this mindset with a colleague the other day and he told me that his father had always encouraged him to do almost the opposite: to avoid making a decision until he was absolutely forced to do so.
Of course, that seemed strange to me, as if he were encouraging procrastination. Far from it: he clarified that it was perfectly acceptable to commit internally to a course of action, while not sharing that knowledge with just any guy on the street.
For example, when considering a career change or new job, it’s perfectly acceptable to keep your employer in the dark until such time as you’re ready to move on. Telling your boss six months in advance that you’re planning to leave may mean that you don’t get to participate in some interesting projects, or may even mean that you get passed over for a promotion–a promotion that, ironically, might make you decide to stay after all. Keeping your mouth shut can help you keep your options open.
Now, as always, there is a balance to be struck, as my friend pointed out: for example, had I not made something of a commitment to working with him on a business project, he might not have invited me to participate in some useful training exercises. Being coy about your level of dedication to a job, or a relationship, or a negotiation can lead to the other party being less open with you, in turn. If you don’t make it clear that you’re on board, certain paths may become closed to you. And, common courtesy (and good career management) says that you shouldn’t leave your team high and dry right just before a big project comes due, or that you should make a move without giving appropriate notice.
Still, it is interesting to consider that it’s not always a good idea to reveal too much.
Is this the same as keeping one’s options open on the sly…?
Sort of…I guess it’s about knowing when to commit, and when to keep your options open. It’s good to commit, but making decisions shifts around the balance of power in a negotiation, and I think you have to consider the impact of that power shift!