7 Words That Deserve a Comeback

The English language continuously evolves. Sadly, this means that worthy words from times of yore frequently make way for things like “LOL” and “blogosphere.” Here are 7 mostly retired words I’d like to see back in the ring:

starch – Not the stuff you put on a collar or avoid while on Atkins, this means toughness, chutzpah, and sheer balls. Actually a pleasant replacement for overused terms synonymous with “testicular fortitude.” She’s got a lot of starch, bringing a bucket of KFC to an anorexia support group.

pantaloons – “Pants” is a funny word, but it’s got nothing on pantaloons. Technically these are a kind of tights, but given that slim jeans are back in style, I think we can stretch the definition. If he doesn’t shut up about Kings of Leon, I’m going to kick him right in his designer pantaloons.

spifflicated – A popular term from the 20s meaning to get bombed, plastered, lit, and heavily intoxicated. Remember that it’s “spiff-licated”, not “spliff-icated,” which is an entirely different sort of intoxication. I tried to get into the jazz bar down the street, but the bouncer said I was already spifflicated and gave me the bum’s rush.

bully to that – Synonymous with “cheers for that,” “good idea,” “I agree,” and “I think Teddy Roosevelt was awesome.” A nice term with a masculine air to it. He told me that after the face-punching contest, we were going to drink whiskey until we’re so drunk we’re sober again, and I said bully to that!

fisticuffs – A gentlemanly term for trading punches. Like other fancy words, it makes getting into a drunken brawl sound high-class and almost respectable. There’s nothing like savoring a little of the old fisticuffs on Monday Night Raw.

greenhorn – In the parlance of our times, a “noob.” Just imagine if kids playing Unreal Tournament started inserting this term into their streams of badly-spelled profanity. Quit hogging the rocket launcher, greenhorn, you keep blowing yourself up!

hubbub – This word describes the aforementioned streams of badly-spelled profanity and other meaningless noise. Perhaps best used by Bugs Bunny when he asked a bomb-pounding Gremlin “What’s all the hubbub, bub?” That’s an awful lot of hubbub for the “small gathering” our keg-carrying upstairs neighbors said they were having.

What words do you think should be back in the common lexicon? Comment below!

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2 Responses to 7 Words That Deserve a Comeback

  1. michael's girlfriend taryn says:

    i’m going to try to bring back moxie. or gumption.

  2. Dawn says:

    I think knickers as in; “don’t get your knickers in a snit.” Come to think of it – snit can be resucitated too!

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